Whereas; we hold the following truths to be either self evident, or so obvious that they barely need elucidating: fun is better than boring, long is better than short, dirty is better than clean, higher is better than lower, bumpy is better than smooth, dogs are better than cats, snow is at least on par with dirt when in significant abundance, organic is better than inorganic, and bacon is better than tofu; we will strive for the betterment of ourselves and our surroundings.
Whereas; funny is a widely ranging concept from putrescently juvenile to dry as bob newhart; we will explore the bounds without regard to the finities of social norms or mores.
Whereas; motivation is half inspiration, half perspiration and half butterscotch ripple, trash talking is permitted and encouraged.
Whereas; everyone in Bacon Strip Land is a buddy; flaming will not be permitted.
Whereas; we like trails, and you like trails, and we know where the trails are, and the more people who ride the trails and learn to appreciate and protect the trails, the better they will become; we will show you where the trails are, what they are called and how to ride them.
Whereas; anyone sufficiently disreputable and gritty who holds in his possession an object festooned with an official TBS ornament shall be permitted to present him or herself as a member of the team provided they act in accordance with the Bacon Strip Manifesto.
to be continued…
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